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description: Dating > 5 rules for dating over 40
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# 5 rules for dating over 40

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The right mindset is key: Start out by knowing that you are in control of the process. Have the courage to speak up and risk rejection like a big boy or girl. Stay fit, stay beautiful, and show him and yourself that you care about being healthy. You can go on to say that you look forward to a relationship, but really…where can a man possibly see time for himself in that picture?\
&#x20;![5 rules for dating over 40](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/d5/05/46/d5054614dd4c4076ef2ba568e5f0b1ee.jpg)\


Watch Now: The 7 Essential Skills Every Man in His 40s Knows. It is something you have to glad at everyday until you're successful. Fact: ultra fancy shoes—the kind you get shined and wear with your best suit—should never be worn with a pair of jeans. Use of any form of informal, emotionally disconnected electronic communication to dump someone is chickenshit, immature and weak. The la who talks the most has the most to lose. As we get older the man-to-woman ratio moves more and more lopsided. Along these lines, another essential dating rule is to keep an open mind when it comes to meeting new people. If you do a tout job describing yourself and painting a picture of what it feels like to be in a relationship with you, it will attract the right men and repel the wrong ones. An executive licked his knife at a white-table-clothed restaurant. Your future is through your windshield. Elements are also more likely to be looking to date a lot and have fun; opposed to sifting through the options looking for the perfect mate. Bored people are boring.

Compassion is the key to having an enjoyable time when you're dating. That was 25 years ago. Expecting a man to act like you and your gal pals is setting yourself up for disaster.\
&#x20;![5 rules for dating over 40](https://media2.s-nbcnews.com/i/MSNBC/Components/Video/__NEW/tdy_kotb_dating_140805.jpg)\


**Dating Advice for Women Over 40** - Some men are lucky enough to fit effortlessly into store-bought suits with no adjustment needed, but those guys are rare.\
&#x20;![5 rules for dating over 40](https://media.gettyimages.com/photos/tulisa-contostavlos-tours-the-coves-with-friends-on-july-12-2013-in-picture-id173383858?s=612x612)\


Other times, however, your experience can work against you. Here are 5 things many people dating over 40 may be doing wrong. For example, if you tell your date that you constantly got into fights with your ex, they might feel that the same thing could happen between the two of you. Your past is past. Focus on the present situation and your current date. I recently went out with a few friends for a drink. While in the bathroom, I overheard this woman who had to be in her late 40s talking to her friends about how she looks better than most 20-year-olds. I admit she looked good, meaning she was physically fit and had a pretty face, but she was wearing a mini-mini skirt with a cut-off shirt, and her breasts were virtually hanging out. Listen, I get it. How about just a nice, short skirt and a little cleavage? Trust me, the guy will be able to see if you have a nice figure or not. Also, when it comes to perfume, why is it the older some women get, the more they put on? Why go out in a wrinkled shirt and express your lack of know-how with an iron and board? Also, leave the ripped jeans at home until a second or third date. And I know sneakers are a big deal to a lot of you, but again, wait for a couple of dates before you sport your designer Nikes. Gentlemen, wearing a baseball cap on your first date is a fashion and personal faux pas, unless, of course, you are at a baseball game. Drinking to excess I know the first date can be a little nerve-wracking, no matter what age. Believe it or not, I hear more stories about people in their 40s drinking a little too much on the first date than any other age bracket. First off, we all have to keep DUIs and safety in mind. All I am saying is, pace yourself and be smart. Save the shots for another time. Too eager or too indifferent I think one of two things happen to us mentally when we date in our 40s. The desperate people who are dating over 40 and want to be married may come on a little too strong, or be so overly willing to please that they scare off their potential mates. So just try to be the person in the middle. Sex more often than not means seeing one another naked. That is a huge step for two people who have just met. Try to get to know each other a little better. I think if you have sex too soon, it can interfere with getting to know the real person. Lust has a way of making us forget everything else, and that includes personal feelings. Try to keep the date PG-rated, okay? Yes, we are all adults, but that also means we should have a level of maturity that allows us to hold out for a while and not succumb to carnal desires just yet. As we get older, we tend to overthink the dating process since we have a larger frame of reference than a 25-year-old. Author on Dating and Relationships Tonia, a successful entrepreneur, received her B. Her career path, however, took her into the fields of marketing, publishing, and sales consulting in which she has worked successfully for the past 25 years. During that time, she has built and managed several companies including her own.
